Don't Get Your Pumpkins in a Pile

The holiday season officially begins the Monday before Halloween.

The Greg Townsend family gathers for pizza, pumpkins, and Halloween classics.

On Monday Hank ate and laughed as he watched Ichabod and Mr. Toad.

My favorite part is watching “It’s the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown”.

Linus and his most sincere pumpkin patch gets me every time.

As I sat in my family home with my own little family I was struck by how far we’ve come.

Traditions always remind me of growth.

They help me think about the past and enjoy the todays.

Sometimes it’s hard to see the growth we really experience, the difference events, time, or teachings really make.

How do you know experiences weren’t wasted on you?

I can’t help but think about a few October’s ago when it was just Jake and I.

We were in the middle of chemotherapy.

Growth was easy to see then.

Pet Scans showed dramatic, positive results.

We had something to work towards.

Trials provide those benchmarks.

You see growth.

They make you different.

But how do we know if it worked?

If it sticks?

If we learned what we could have learned?

Just after Jake’s diagnosis, we got pulled over on the way home from some tests at the hospital.

Jake wasn’t wearing a seatbelt.

The officer was kind. He gave us a warning.

As he walked back to his car I realized something.

I wasn’t mad.

I wasn’t even a little annoyed.

I would have been. A few months before. A few weeks before even.

I was different.

We got closer over those months than I ever imagined possible.

That was three years ago.

Things are different now.

It’s sometimes harder to see progress.

And so sometimes I wonder, am I learning what I can?

Am I better?

Different now?

A few weekends ago we drove down the freeway.

A little too fast.

The flashing red and blue lights signaled a stop and ticket.

I wasn’t mad.

I wasn’t even a little annoyed.

I’m still different.

We’re closer than we’ve ever been.

I have a framed print on a table by the front door.

It has a handful of painted pumpkins and the phrase,

“Don’t Get Your Pumpkins in a Pile”.

So I guess that’s the message.

That’s how I know it worked.

I’ve grown.

I’m different.

​Maybe that's why I'm so happy.