When I was 5 or 6 years old I got my first bike. I was at my Grandpa Townsend's house to celebrate my birthday. My Aunt Kelly and my dad rolled the bike into the living room. It was pink and white with rainbow butterflies, streamers, and training wheels. I remember being so excited until it was time to ride it. We took it outside and I sat down. Moments after starting to pedal the bike through the gravel, I toppled over. I didn't want anything to do with the bike after that.
I got over it. I learned to ride without training wheels, but my dad still reminds me about that first bike birthday. I haven't had a lot of experience with bikes since those younger years. Jake loves mountain biking and road biking. Just in passing I mentioned to him that we should start looking for a bike for me to ride. We could go on bike rides around town in the evenings together. Jake has been so excited to find me a bike. We can learn a lot about our lives from our bikes. Bikes remind us that in order to stay upright, we have to keep pedaling. Jake and I learned a few things from ours this week. I came home yesterday to find a very guilty looking Jake. He had gone to the bike shop excited to look at bikes for me, and left with one very much outside our price range. I was a little surprised, but how could I be mad or frustrated with my handsome husband with the best intentions? After talking about it, we decided he'd take it back today. I came home for lunch to see that same guilty husband. I asked him how returning the bike went. He rushed into a story he didn't want to tell me, and I could tell he was sorry. He told me the guy at the bike shop could only give him a partial refund. He refunded part of our money and left Jake with an in-store credit. My Sweetheart was just heartbroken. He knew he'd spent a little too much money than we had in the budget, and now he was trapped into spending it even after returning the bike. I laughed. I told him not to worry, and then I gave him a kiss. He went to the bike shop and came home with the only one in our in-store credit price range. It's bright blue and green. It's new but the frame is a little beat up, and the spokes are dusty from being on the shelf so long. The stickers are peeling off, and I wouldn't change a thing. I love my bike. I love my husband. And if any of you are wondering, I'm the happiest I have ever been.
1 Comment
There is a big apricot tree in front of the house I grew up in. A little white swing hangs from the branches with a tiny inscription on the back left corner reading, "Madeline's Swing". I earned the swing from spending hours and hours there. It became mine when I let Jake sit with me.
I fell in love with a summer version of Jake. Tan skin, wiffle ball tournaments, bowling excursions, listening to Coldplay and Bon Jovi, and Parowan walks. One of the sweetest aspects of being married is having someone to fall in love with every season. I'm looking forward to our first summer as newlyweds and I still remember the sweet summer we had when I first picked him. One specific summer memory comes to mind. We spent most of our summer evenings together outside. One day it was raining. Hard. It was a beautiful summer storm, the kind that makes the whole town smell good when it's over. Despite the rain, Jake and I went outside and sat down on the swing. We sat in the rain and talked for hours about our favorite first day of school, most embarrassing moments, and favorite memories. As it starts to get warmer I remember that summer. I fall in love with him all over again. Today Jake hugged me tight and told me I smell like Summer Maddie: sunscreen and gum. "Hi Summer Maddie" he said, "It's been a while". It has. I'm completely in love with my sweetheart. Maybe that's why my life is so happy. Love is what you go through together. If this phrase is true, my parents are definitely in love. They have gone through so much, but if I had to condense their whole 21 years of marriage to one instance, I would be able to, and I'd pick this one.
One day my dad asked my mom to stick rolls on the grocery list. He was having a lunch meeting at work and was asked to bring rolls as his food assignment. The lunch wasn't until early the following week so my mom told him that she had plenty of time and would love to do that for him. The meeting approached and my mom forgot the rolls. Between driving kids to and from practices or school, cooking, cleaning, working, church callings, and taking care of my dad and the rest of the family, she had forgotten the rolls put on the grocery list the week before. Nobody noticed for a while except my dad. He didn't bring it up. Though he had asked my mom kindly, and had given her plenty of time to complete the task, he didn't bring it up. Not even a mention in passing. None of us remembered the rolls. I came home from school for lunch and found a vase of red roses on our kitchen counter. My mom was admiring them when I walked in. I asked her where they came from, and she told me dad had sent them for no reason. I remember how happy she looked. Not only did my dad not mention the rolls, but he sent roses. It wasn't until a little after the roses had started to wilt that my mom realized her mistake. She felt terrible, but my dad told her not to worry, and enjoy the roses. It's often said that every little girl wants to marry someone like their dad. I did. But the part we leave off sometimes is equally important. Every little girl should grow up to love like their mom. I've forgotten the rolls in our little relationship over and over. I'm sure there are even more times I haven't realized yet. Jake doesn't bring it up though, he brings roses. I bet that's why I'm so happy. When I was little I used to collect pennies. I found them in parking lots, on top of dressers, in car ash trays or in my dad’s pockets. I kept them all together in a red bandana on the floor in my closet. At night I would empty my pockets and introduce each penny to the others in my possession. I remember worrying about them being alone. Sometimes I would hop out of bed after the rest of the house had gone to sleep just to check on the pennies. I didn’t want any of them to have to spend the night outside the bandana, alone. “How did you know Jake was ‘the one’?” a question I’ve heard a few times these past couple of married months. I moved to Parowan the summer before my freshman year of high school with my family. The Townsends have deep Parowan roots, so moving didn’t seem like that big of a deal. I would be surrounded by cousins, grandparents, aunts and uncles, and old family friends. I could go to a small high school and grow up in the place my Dad had talked about my whole life. I was ready until it happened. I remember one day feeling completely overwhelmed at the prospect of starting over, leaving opportunities and friends to come to a new place. My dad gave me some advice. After taking me aside and listening to my concerns he made me a promise. He said, “Maddie. When doors close, Heavenly Father tends to open new ones in Parowan”. He was right. One of those doors was Jake. I didn’t know Jake was ‘the one’. I did know that I needed to be trying to become more like Jesus Christ. Each time I tried, I found Jake there too. He is the culmination of every good decision I’ve ever made.
The truth is there is no one reason, one way I knew, just a collection of little things, penny stories I keep in a pile close to me. Jake brushing the snow off and starting my car before work every morning in his snow boots and gym shorts. Texting me songs he heard at work that reminds him of me. I look at him when he’s not watching sometimes and I feel happy. I picked him. I pick him every day. Sometimes when the rest of the house is asleep, I take a look at each of the penny stories I keep in my head, and thank my Heavenly Father that I don’t ever have to be alone. At the end of the day I still empty my pockets. I put my pennies in a jar by the bed. Jake gives me his too. I guess that’s why I’m so happy. My mom tells me I've loved Bon Jovi for a long time. She remembers me at two or three years old singing along with her while we cleaned the kitchen together. I actually knew the words. It's funny that music holds some kind of memory or connection for all of us. We could go weeks, years even without hearing a song and still remember every word. Bon Jovi has a lot of my memories. I remember singing to "Livin' on a Prayer" with my mom and dad in the car, or "Have a Nice Day" with my sister while we cleaned our room. I remember "Lost Highway" playing on our computer while we packed up our Salem house to move to Parowan. "Keep the Faith" got me through midterms this semester. In every stage of life, Bon Jovi has been there somehow. And though marriage has made my life a little different, that fact hasn't changed. Just a few days ago, Jake and I sat in the nosebleeds at the T-mobile arena in Las Vegas to watch Bon Jovi on his new tour, "This House is Not for Sale". My heart was beating so fast. I saw someone live that has been such a large part of my life, and he has no idea. I had goosebumps the entire time and my throat was sore and voice hoarse by the time the concert was over. It was just as amazing as I ever imagined, and it reminded me of a lot of great memories. A specific memory comes to mind. One Bon Jovi song stands out from the rest, it's lesser known, in fact it's just a bonus track from Bon Jovi's Album "Bounce" that wasn't even released originally. I remember sitting in my dad's silver Chevy Cavalier singing "Lucky" at the top of my lungs. Shelbey and I were going to check the mail. It was always an exciting trip because we'd yell "Punch it Chewy" like Han Solo and my dad would step on the gas. We'd laugh and laugh, and I'd realize I was lucky.
I was doing the dishes yesterday, a chore I've neglected lately. I found one of our backup forks in the sink. Jake had to use one because somehow the two of us go through all eight of ours before one of us gets to the dishes. I laughed. I'm Lucky. He got home from work earlier this week and I was so excited I waited by the door when I heard his car pull up. I scared the crap out of him but he hung on to me anyways. I'm Lucky. He brought me a Diet Coke at work today, and then stayed to drink half of it with me during my break. So Lucky. I'm lucky baby. So lucky baby. Lucky to be with you today. Lucky to be the one to say I'm lucky. And I am. Jake and I both have Bon Jovi memories now. He held my hand at that concert. He learned all the songs from the new album and my favorites from the old ones. He watched me with a big smile while one of my dreams came true. He drove me all the way home with the heater way too high while I slept. On the way home from the concert he woke me up to tell me he wanted to say the nicest thing he'd ever said to me. After a little thought he asked me to get back to him once he had a minute to come up with it. I assured him he didn't need to say anything. I already knew. I'm lucky. So lucky. And I'm happy. |
AuthorMy name is Maddie Townsend Topham and I am a happy wife! Archives
November 2022
Categories |